nuts and bolts

i had a panic attack this morning about where my passport was.
luckily i found it really quickly, exactly where i'd left it.
would that all such attacks ended as successfully.

april really sucks. filling out new financial aid forms, taxes, finding a new apartment. money so scarce. i feel like i'm standing on quicksand. the europe trip grows murkier by the day. don't want to post about that until i have a better idea of what's going on. sigh. if this is being grown up...

actually i quite like being an adult, and the stuff that i always thought i'd be so concerned with is actually working out quite well. i'm happy with my love life, and i am doing well in school. i'm scared of the future, but i don't have to worry about that for a while...
the things that get me down are the nuts and bolts, the details that i'm not organised enough to handle, the way things pile up and i hide ostrich-like and hope they will disappear. i hate that.