small quandaries

have just received e-mail from the lovely artistic director of our theatre company - asking if i'll be in nyc this week, and if i'd come in and be on book for the solo play that she's doing.
three days, five hours a day.
i'm in two minds.
of course, it's fun, and i'd like to help out, and twould be constructive i've no doubt. and it'd be fun working in the theat-ah, dah-ling, in new york, no less. always a small dream of mine.
silly to be so concerned with place, but there it is.
but -of course there's a but-
i don't particularly want to go to work on my vacation.
not even one little bit.
and i've got a sneaking suspicion there's no money involved either.
well, i shall give it some thought.

d. arrives tomorrow for a few hours before catching his plane.
i'm hoping all goes well.
my father heard the news, and retreated into his bedroom, sulking and playing free cell furiously and endlessly. he's not got a word to throw to anyone.
he's such a madman, and such a child.
heaven grant me patience!

i have been on a steady diet of l.m. montgomery and louisa may alcott ever since i came home. i think it's beginning to show.

nice day for a white wedding

d. is gone, off to the wedding.
i am jealous. i would have liked to see him in his tux, being all groom's-man-y. also, i've never been to a church wedding before. it sounded like a vaguely interesting experience, if one i'm not ever expecting to partake in.
i know i want children someday, and conceivably even a partner to share life with. but it seems an entirely unimaginable experience.
i just can't picture it somehow. but a life without romantic attachment. that i can imagine perfectly well.
i suppose it will be peopled with friends and lovers from books: that and a good vibrator, what else does one really need.

i miss him already.

i am also extremely tired. this two hours of sleep thing is getting old.