fictional: (Default)
kali ([personal profile] fictional) wrote2002-08-01 10:20 am

soul laryngitis

i've lost my voice.
it was not a good night.
i am shaken and confused and ashamed of myself.
not a happy mix.

actually it hasn't been a good couple of weeks. i don't know what's the matter with me. i feel caught up in this morass of tangled emotions that i have no idea how to unravel. last night was just a symptom of the disease.

i've lost my voice.
i don't know what i want, or what i don't want. or how to get what i need. i feel all alone, out in a lonely place that i don't know how to navigate.

the trouble is that i really thought better of myself. i thought i had this under control. i thought i knew how to stand up for myself. but no. and it's no one's fault but my own.

and now all i hear coming out of my throat is this never ending stream of apologies.

[identity profile] soulhaus.livejournal.com 2002-08-01 08:34 am (UTC)(link)

*hugs*

[identity profile] magnetgirl.livejournal.com 2002-08-02 11:20 am (UTC)(link)
:::grumbles:::

People can have that effect on you. They can talk to you about things in a certain way so you start questioning yourself and can't say what you want to.

I think you just need to boil it all down to what you really feel. The reasons WHY you can't decide what you want. They may be your answer-and also clear things up for those other than yourself.

Uhms...I really want to talk to you.
I've been thinking about things A LOT. I may be able to offer some comfort?

It's worth a shot, at least :-)
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

-MG