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Jan. 20th, 2005 07:24 amI just finished my last paper of this semester. It is approximately 7:30am - I have been awake forever, and I am sad. Not because the paper is done, but I just re-read it and didn't like it. I'm hoping that this is just late night - early morning heebie jeebies -
but that part of me that just generally believes I suck in every bad way imaginable - is refusing to shut the fuck up. So okay.
I've got a resolve on to work harder - and looking back at this semester, I can see all the ways that I could have - mostly involving doing work when I say I'm going to, and not just reading fanfic, or day-dreaming instead. But in other ways, I feel like I gave up so many things I wanted to do, so I could study, or work, or whatever. And then instead, I just frittered away my time.
No more. I have so many things I want to do. Two people have taken up residence in my head, and I'm so happy to have them, and eventually I hope they'll say some stuff to me that screams to be written down, and I will stop what I'm doing and do just that. There'll never be a better time to start then now.
but that part of me that just generally believes I suck in every bad way imaginable - is refusing to shut the fuck up. So okay.
I've got a resolve on to work harder - and looking back at this semester, I can see all the ways that I could have - mostly involving doing work when I say I'm going to, and not just reading fanfic, or day-dreaming instead. But in other ways, I feel like I gave up so many things I wanted to do, so I could study, or work, or whatever. And then instead, I just frittered away my time.
No more. I have so many things I want to do. Two people have taken up residence in my head, and I'm so happy to have them, and eventually I hope they'll say some stuff to me that screams to be written down, and I will stop what I'm doing and do just that. There'll never be a better time to start then now.
