music from a different time

[fictional]

so close no matter how far
couldn't be much more from the heart...

i've been listening to music that i didn't take to college with me,
from before i left this home again, hopefully for the last time.
music from that last year here...

that year was so intense. possibly the longest one of my life.
i remember that burning feeling in my stomach.
that wrench. that "i'm not where i'm supposed to be"
i've never wanted to disappear from existence so badly.
everything hurt.

things are better now. so much better.
but i'm listening to this music that i used to help me keep faith
through sleepless 4am's, trite sayings that i used like mantras to keep myself believing that things would work out, somehow.
and it still burns, a little.

...forever trusting who we are
and nothing else matters

Comments

well i'm not seventeen

[sykii.livejournal.com]

but i've cuts on my knees
falling down as the winter
takes one more cherry tree...

we were none of us who, where, or what we were supposed to be, then.

we were so much older then, we're younger than that now.